


Only a Winter's Tale

by SevReed



Category: Victorious, Victorious (TV)
Genre: F/F, Jori (Victorious)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-05-30 10:58:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15095300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SevReed/pseuds/SevReed
Summary: Jade finds an unexpected visitor on a cold New Year's Eve.





	1. In the Midnight Hour

**Author's Note:**

> Note: This was originally a one-shot, then I expanded it, then I gave it up and it was kindly taken over by VoltageStone and re-written as 'Only a Winter's Tale II', then I decided to carry on, but with a different storyline. 
> 
> So there are now two versions of it, just to confuse you. Sorry.
> 
> Again, notes in bold are from the original posting.

**_Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Here's a little number I tossed off recently in the Caribbean…_ **

**No, not really. But ten points if you know where that's from without looking it up. Actually this is the other 'New Year' story I wrote over the holidays but never got round to posting, I thought I'd give it a polish and take it out for a spin. I don't know if there'll be any more to it, it's pretty self-contained, but I'll leave it up to you guys to decide if you want another chapter.**

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_It was only a winter's tale_

_Just another winter's tale_

_And why should the world take notice_

_Of one more love that's failed?_

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Jade West sat alone in her room, cross-legged on the bed. New Year's Eve. It was New Year's Eve and she was sick. Too sick to go to the party, too sick to venture far from the safety of her room and its en-suite bathroom. But she'd stayed up anyway, long enough to see the new year in. Partly from a dogged determination not to let herself be beaten by a bug, and partly because she'd made a resolution. Not a big resolution, not a life-changing, epic upheaval, but a resolution nonetheless. Because she could still see their faces when she'd announced that she wouldn't be able to make the party, when she'd sat down and given them the tragic, cataclysmic news that she wouldn't be going, that Jade West would not be attending. They'd tried not to show it, but it was there all the same. Relief. An atmosphere of palpable relief. Even Beck, who'd had more practice than most, couldn't bring himself to look disappointed. Only Tori managed to cover her euphoria. In fact, Tori, strangely, had looked anything but pleased, and had slunk away from the table with barely a word, unable to catch her eye.

But no more. Things were going to change.

She wasn't going to go crazy with it, obviously. She wasn't going to start baking cookies or having slumber parties or not laughing when something terrible happened to Trina, that would be ridiculous. But she was going to mellow a little, try to be more of a 'people person'. Friendlier. Less of a gank. And so at midnight exactly, she'd sent out a dozen texts. _Happy New Year_.

She hadn't punctuated it with a million exclamation marks, or festooned it with smiley faces and hearts, but it was a start. She'd never wished anyone a happy new year before, she'd never seen the point. Why should she care if they had a happy new year? That was up to them, it was no skin off her nose if they screwed up. But it had slowly dawned on her that people expected these things, that they were the grease that kept the wheels turning, and if you didn't do those things, pretty soon the wheels rusted solid and before you knew it you were staring into the faces of the only friends you had, knowing that they'd rather you weren't there.

That was half an hour ago.

Now she stared at her phone, as it stared blankly back at her. Nothing. Not a single response. Not even Beck, who she'd expected to reply out of habit, or at least in acknowledgement of the fact they'd once been a couple. Nothing.

She pressed the button to keep the screen alive, as she had been doing every thirty seconds since she sent the texts. Still nothing. She felt her resolution crumble, turn to ashes in her mouth. Too little too late. It was stupid to think that a text would change anything. She told herself that perhaps they hadn't noticed, that they were too busy dancing, or it was too loud to hear the phone, but it didn't make any difference. Her little gesture of reconciliation was lost in the darkness, unheard in the noise of the fun they were having while she wasn't there. _Because_ she wasn't there, probably.

She was still mulling this over when the text came through. The ping made her jump, as the screen flashed into life. One new message.

It must be Beck. He must have had a drunken moment of guilt. She unlocked the phone.

**Happy New Year x.**

She blinked. It was from Tori. Out of all of them, only Tori had cared enough to reply. She felt a sudden surge of affection for the girl she'd spent so long fighting with, a re-evaluation of the girl that just wouldn't roll over and give in. She'd been pretty mean to Tori, all things considered, and that in itself made it all the more surprising that she should be the one to respond. And yet that was her all over, always ready to bounce back when she'd been pushed away, keep on smiling through the worst she could throw at her. Maybe she was reading too much into it, maybe Tori had an obsessive compulsion that made her reply to every text she got. But even that was part of her warmth, part of what made her shine. And what she wouldn't give for a little of that right now. To have her here, lighting up the dark, banishing the cold with a hug.

She swiped the phone and began to type, conscious of losing the moment. _How's the party?_

There was a pause, and she pictured Tori squinting at the message in a crowded room, chewing her lip in concentration as she typed her reply.

**It was okay. We missed you.**

She laughed in the dark. She knew Tori was lying to spare her feelings. There was a stinging behind the eyes, and she realized she was crying. This flu thing was making her way too emotional. She wiped at her cheek with her sleeve.

_Where are you now?_

**I'm outside.**

What was she doing outside? Waiting for a taxi? It was freezing. Maybe she should scrape herself off her deathbed and go collect her, give her a lift home. That was the kind of self-sacrifice she'd appreciate.

_Outside where?_

Another pause.

**Your house.**

The words danced on the screen. Your house. Nine letters that seemed to make absolutely no sense. Whose house? My house? Why would she be…

She reached the bottom of the stairs before the phone hit the bed, and yanked open the front door, to find a shivering Tori Vega on her doorstep. Flakes of snow were settling gently in her hair.

"What the hell?"

"Oh, hi," the other girl said, as though there was nothing remotely unusual about turning up at someone's house in the snow at twelve-thirty in the morning. "I was just-"

"Get in here." She grabbed Tori by the arm, noticing how thin her jacket was. "You'll catch your death out there."

Tori came in, dripping gently. "Thanks."

"Did you walk here?"

"Only from the party," Tori said. "It's not far."

"But why, for God's sake?"

"You texted me."

"Only to wish you a happy new year," Jade said. "I didn't mean for you to drop everything and come over."

"Do you want me to go?"

"What? No, of course not," Jade said quickly. "I'm just surprised, that's all. I didn't think..."

"Didn't think what?"

"No one else even replied to my text."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay. "She shrugged. "Maybe they never got it."

There was a guilty silence while Tori looked shiftily at her feet.

"They did, didn't they?" Jade said, accusingly. "They all got it. Right, that's it," she said. "Forget the stupid resolution, first day back at school, they're dead meat."

"What resolution?"

Jade was still lost in a fantasy of mass destruction. "I am so gonna… What?"

"I said, what resolution?"

"Oh. It was nothing," she muttered. "I was just-" She found the words sticking in her throat, and coughed. "I was just going to try being nicer to people, that's all."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Jade said, bitterly. "Well, they've had that. If no one wants to know, then screw 'em."

" _I_ want to know." Tori said.

"I…" Jade's mouth opened and closed a few times but she didn't know what to say. She noticed that Tori was looking at her oddly. "What?"

"Are you crying?"

She blinked, and felt warmth on her cheeks. "No," she said, brushing the tear away. "It's just this stupid bug I've got."

"Right."

They stood facing each other for a moment. A cold breeze blew in from the still open door, but Tori made no move to close it. Jade wondered if she was leaving herself an escape route. "So, did you bring chicken soup?" she said, trying to lighten the conversation.

"What?"

"Chicken soup. It's what people usually bring when they're trying to make you feel better."

"No, I didn't bring chicken soup."

"Oh. Well, that's good," she said. "Because I hate chicken soup."

"I know."

There was another long pause, and Jade began to wonder if she was missing something. Tori seemed distracted, tense. "Do you want a drink or something?" she said. "I can put on some coffee, or-"

"Jade?" Tori stared down at her fingers.

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Do you hate me?"

Jade felt a chill that had nothing to do with the open door. "No, of course I don't hate you," she said. "Why would you think that?"

Tori said nothing, and there was something about the way she was stood, eyes down, head bowed, swaying slightly, that unnerved Jade.

"Look, I know I can be a gank at times," she said, suddenly desperate to justify herself. "But that's just us, isn't it? Me and you. You know, high-jinks, laughs. We butt heads, we face off. But I don't really _mean_ it. I don't hate you. If anything, I... kind of like you," she finished, lamely.

Tori nodded. "Good," she murmured, almost to herself. "That's good."

Jade waited, but there was no more. "Please tell me you didn't come all the way over here just to ask me that." She'd meant it lightly, but to her dismay it came out as slightly pitiful.

Tori looked up. "No, I didn't."

"So…?"

"So?"

Jade shrugged, helpless in the face of Tori's reticence. "So, why _did_ you come over?"

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_Another year. Another party. But this year it was different._

_Jade wasn't there. Tori had looked forward to this for weeks, and then Jade had cried off sick. She didn't know why it bothered her so much - it didn't seem to bother anyone else, they'd barely been able to hide their delight when she told them she wasn't going, and Tori had had to leave the table before she said anything reckless. And it wasn't as if she wasn't going to see her again after the holidays, they'd be arguing and fighting before the snow outside was off the ground. But still she'd looked forward to seeing her tonight, to that slight acknowledgement that they existed outside of school. Because school was ending soon, and the thought that they were just classmates whose last shared moments would be a faded graduation photograph filled her with a sudden despair. It was ridiculous, she knew, Jade probably wouldn't give two hoots about the fact she'd never see her again, but still she couldn't help it, couldn't help looking for a sign, just the slightest indication, that it wasn't true, that there was more to them than that. Because if there wasn't, then the next time she was at a party like this, stood waiting for the clock to strike midnight, it would all be over. She'd be at college, and Jade would be just a memory. She_ _harbored a secret, fond hope that one day Jade might just call her up out of the blue, and say 'Hey, Vega, let's do lunch'. But then she also dreamed about owning a pony, and getting her driver's license, and of the three, she'd be driving a pick-up and towing a horse-box long before she'd be sat at a table watching delicate black-polished nails push silver cutlery across white linen._

_And then Jade's text had arrived. She'd looked up, excited, hoping to catch someone's eye and share the moment, but all she saw was Beck pull his phone from his pocket, glance at it, and put it away, grinning at Andre over the shoulder of the drunken girl in his arms. And she felt a sense of anger, of injustice. Lately he'd got it into his head that he could have Jade back any time he wanted, just tilt his head with that stupid look on his face and she'd come running, but he couldn't even be bothered to acknowledge her message. And it burned her to see Jade dismissed like that, with a wink and a shrug, as though her friendship didn't matter, to see a gift she'd treasure so deeply, treated so cheaply by the one person it had ever been given to._

_And it was then that she realized what she'd been chasing all this time, why she felt this overwhelming protectiveness towards the girl who'd both shut her out and let her in, why the thought of Jade sat, alone and unwanted, made her chest hurt and her stomach churn. So she picked up her phone, and she grabbed her coat, and she screwed up her courage and swallowed her doubts. A fool's errand, but there was something in the air tonight, something different. She shouldered her way through the crowd and out into the cold of the night._

_._

_._

_._

She turned, and closed the door. "You want to know why I came?" she said. Her voice was soft, distant, but the sudden hush as the wind dropped made it echo in the silence. She pressed a finger to the other girl's lips.

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"Because I made a resolution, too."

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**Well, I think we can all guess what Tori's resolution is, and it's nothing to do with starting a chicken soup delivery service. Anyway, there you go, let me know if you want any more. Otherwise, bye for now.**


	2. A Fool's Errand

**Hi. I wasn't sure whether to go on with this, but then I found that I was actually writing it, so here's another chapter. This won't be a long story, just a few chapters, unless you want to see it go further.**

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_It was a love that could never be…_

_Though it meant a lot to you and me…_

_On a worldwide scale…_

_We're just another winter's tale._

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Jade stood, rooted to the spot, mouth open, lost in a world drastically different from the one she'd known only a few minutes ago. A few minutes before Tori had turned it upside down.

 _I made a resolution_ , she'd said. And then she'd told her something so devastating, so unexpected, that Jade had found herself unable to respond, to form a reply, to find any words whatsoever.

_I like you._

She could still see her now, shifting awkwardly from foot to foot, a curious light in her eyes, her expression torn between embarrassment and a steely defiance.

_I missed you. At the party. And I don't know why, because I knew that all you'd do was make fun of me, or ignore me, or spill beer over me. But still I wanted you to be there, because something felt different. Like it was the end of something. This time next year we'll all be gone, and I know the guys will stay in touch, and meet up, and visit, and all those things, but it won't be the same._

_And then your text came through, and I realized why I missed you, and why the thought of never seeing you again hurt so much._

_I like you, Jade. I don't mean as a person, or as a friend, or that I admire you, or any of that, although all of that's true. I mean, I like you. As more than just a friend. And I know you'll think that's weird after everything we've been through, after all the fights, and the arguments, and I'm not sure I understand it myself, but there it is. I've finally worked out what it is that keeps driving me to be with you, to look out for you, to see your face even when it isn't there. I like you._

There had been a terrible silence, and some of the light had faded from her eyes.

_I'm not asking anything of you, Jade. I'm not crazy enough to think that you feel the same about me, or that anything's going to change. I know that the best I can hope for is that you don't throw me out, or laugh at me, although I hope you might think enough of me as a friend to at least keep this between us. It's been so hard coming here, and I'm not sure I could stand it if everyone knew, but I had to do it. I know that this is probably a fool's errand, but if I don't tell you this now, tonight, I know never will, and I'll spend the rest of my life regretting it._

_Because if there was even the slightest chance that you might want me, I have to take it._

And then she was gone.

_._

_._

_._

Jade blinked, and realized she was staring at empty space, at the half open door where Tori had stood moments before.

_You idiot._

Jade wasn't a cruel person. Not really. She liked to toy with people sometimes, like a cat playing with a leaf on the breeze - and she knew that occasionally she went too far, and her claws caught, and it hurt, but she knew that this was different. This was a whole different game. Tori's confession must have taken a huge leap of faith; she couldn't imagine how much courage it must have taken to just lay it on the line like that, to leave herself wide open to fate. And what had Jade done?

She'd just stood there with her mouth open, gawping at the poor girl as though it was the stupidest thing she'd ever heard.

_Nice one, West._

And now Tori was out there somewhere in the cold, feeling rejected and worthless, as though her courage counted for nothing. Jade took a moment to curse herself as a terrible human being, before she rammed her feet into her boots, grabbed her coat and headed out in pursuit.

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The snow was heavier now, and she wondered exactly how long she'd spent standing there like an idiot. There was no sign of Tori, but a series of depressions that had once been the footprints of the fleeing girl were still visible. She followed them down the street and around the corner, confident that she could move faster in her boots than Tori could in heels, and that at any moment she'd catch her up, explain, and then...

And then what? What would she say? What _could_ she say? _Thanks but no thanks? I'm flattered? It's not you it's me?_ On the face of it, this should be easier than brushing off a guy, because at least she had the cast-iron excuse that Tori knew she wasn't gay. But then Tori wasn't, either. Or was she? Was this her moment of enlightenment? And if it was, why _her_ , for God's sake?

She tried to replay their relationship in her head, from all-out war in the few weeks, through a grudging acceptance, to something approaching friendship. They'd still fought, but without the bitterness that came from anger, as though they were both simply going through the motions, antagonist and protagonist, bad girl and good girl, a comedy drama with no hard feelings afterwards. She'd once privately decided that if she had to pick just one person to be stranded on a desert island with, it would be Tori. Tori would be the only one who could keep her sane. Not Beck - the romantic idyll would soon cloy, and boredom would lead to rage and a fifty percent reduction in the island's population. But Tori... She'd smiled as she'd pictured the two of them, in grass skirts and coconut-shell bras, bickering and laughing as they collected mangoes in the tattered remains of Tori's monster purse that had washed ashore with them clinging desperately to its handles. She'd never in a million years have admitted that to Tori, of course, because that wasn't how they rolled. They just played the game. _I win, you lose. You win, I lose._ No hard feelings. No feelings at all.

Except now there _were_ feelings, and that changed everything. The whole dynamic would be different. However she treated Tori now, it could only ever be seen through the prism of Tori's confession. Teasing her now would feel cruel and heartless - being affectionate doubly so, as though she was toying with her emotions, or worse, pitying the poor girl. _Crap_. Never mind about _thanks but no thanks_ , what she really wanted to do, when she finally caught up with Tori in the goddamned snowstorm, was grab her by the ears and shake her till her teeth rattled, and say, _How could you do this? How could you ruin my only friendship by actually liking me?_

She cursed and moved on, and saw to her dismay that the footprint petered out and stopped at the edge of the sidewalk. She glanced up and down along the street, but it was empty as far as she could see through the falling snow. She looked down again at the prints. Tire tracks at the curb. Tori must have flagged down a cab.

She stood, defeated. The year was only an hour old, and already everything was against her. And then another thought struck her - what if it hadn't been a cab? She had a horrible vision of Tori being abducted off the street, bundled into the back of a car by a passing pervert. She reached for her phone in panic, and realized she'd left it back at the house. She turned on her heel and sprinted back up the street, slipping and slithering in the snow.

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_No answer. No answer. No answer. Voicemail._

_Off._

Jade stared at the screen. Tori had switched it off. Or at least someone had. She tried to think. Should she call the police? No, they'd laugh at her. How long had she been missing? Fifteen minutes? Twenty? Barely enough time to get home.

Home. Of course. She scrolled down her contacts. She had Tori's home number somewhere, for those awkward moments when she suspected everyone was hanging out there but hadn't actually been invited. _Hey, Mr. V, how's it going? Are the guys there yet? Yeah, Tori totally forgot to tell me what time to come over. I know, teenagers, right?_

She made the call, and waited anxiously for someone to pick up.

"Hello?" It was Tori's mom, her voice pitched somewhere between annoyance and caution.

Jade took a breath. "Hi," she said. "Look, I'm really, really sorry to bother you. It's Jade, Tori's... friend from school. I just wondered if she was back yet."

There was a short pause. "Yes," Holly said. "She just got back. Why?"

Jade let out a sigh of relief that must have sounded like a hurricane on the other end of the line. "Thank God for that."

It dawned on her too late that that perhaps wasn't what Tori's mom wanted to hear. "Why? What's wrong?" Holly said, with a note of panic.

"Nothing," Jade said, hastily. "Everything's fine. I just wanted to check she got back safely, that's all."

"Oh." The panic subsided. "Well, yes, she did. Do you want to talk to her? She might still be awake."

Jade considered it, but if Tori had turned off her phone it didn't seem likely she'd want to talk. "No, it's okay," she said. "I'll catch her later."

"Okay. Well I'll tell her you called. I'm sure she'll appreciate it."

It seemed unlikely. "Okay, thanks."

There was another short pause, and Jade was about to kill the call when Holly said, "Jade?"

"Yeah?"

"Did something happen at the party?"

Jade was about to say that she wasn't there, but realized that would lead to a whole bunch of questions that she didn't want to answer. "What do you mean?"

"It's just Tori seemed a little... off when she came in. Like she was upset about something."

 _Great_. "Did she say anything?"

"No, she just went straight to her room."

Jade hesitated. "No, nothing happened," she said. "We had a great time. I guess she was just tired, that's all."

"Oh. Well, okay, then."

Jade cut the call, and lay down on the bed with a long groan. Tori was still alive, and that was what mattered. Everything else could wait for another day. It occurred to her that running around in the snow when you had the flu wasn't the best idea in the world, and decided she was now morally justified in feeling sorry for herself. She kicked off her boots and crawled under the covers, pulling them up to her chin, shivering and sniffing, her nose running and her eyes stinging. Everything would look different in the morning. Maybe not better, but different. There was always the possibility that all this was a fever dream, and that she'd wake up tomorrow to find herself back in the real world, a happy, carefree world where everything was normal, influenza bugs had more sense than to mess with her, and the funny, pretty little girl from school hadn't just turned up on her doorstep to say that she loved her.

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**So, tomorrow's another day. Is Tori going to regret her confession?**


	3. WWJD?

**Hi, I've been a little slow with this, my apologies – I'm still a little torn between this and 'Green Eyes'. Anyway, let's press on a little further and take a look at Tori's reaction. Many thanks for the reviews.**

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There is a boon given to those who wake from a night of heavy drinking, a short spell of blissful ignorance, a warm, snuggly period of oblivion during which the events of the night before are a distant mystery. It's a time of peace, a moment of tranquility, a brief return to the womb. But it's not without price. Because the downside is that the longer the lull before the storm, the harder the storm will hit. Tori's countdown to disaster had begun.

_Ten…_

"Tori?" Her mom knocked gently on the door. "Tori? Are you awake yet?"

"Mmmmmmnnn," she managed. She knew, instinctively, not to move. The hangover wasn't allowed to start until you moved.

_Nine…_

"Do you want anything from the store?"

"Mmmmmmnnn."

_Eight…_

"Trina's making waffles, if you want any."

"Mmmmmmnnn."

_Seven…_

"Oh, someone called for you last night, just after you went to bed."

"Mmmmmmnnn?"

_Six…_

"It was that girl from school, Jade. I think she just wanted to check you got in okay."

_Fivefourthreetwoonebang._

Tori's head shot up from the pillow in horror, her brain catching up a second later and crashing painfully against the inside of her skull.

Oh, God.

She'd gone over to Jade's after the party.

Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, no.

She'd marched all the way over in the snow, stood there like an idiot and told her how she felt.

She felt her skin tightening on her scalp as the pain in her head was overcome by an awful writhing in her stomach, and she curled up under the covers in a tight ball, arms clutched over her belly, trying to fight the churning that had nothing to do with excess and everything to do with cringing embarrassment.

How could she have been so stupid? What on earth had possessed her to do that? She played the evening back in her head. Midnight. Jade's text had come through and everyone had ignored it. And buoyed by alcohol and a fierce sense of injustice, she'd marched over there and told her she liked her, an act unrivalled in the history of human misjudgment, if Jade's blank-faced look of horror was anything to go by.

What was Jade going to do to her? She could easily crucify her now, if not physically, then emotionally. Her humiliation at school would be complete, the gang would never be the same once everyone knew. She'd have to go back to Sherwood.

But... Reality started to seep back in. Jade had _called_. She scrabbled for her phone and stared at its black screen. She remembered now, ignoring it in the taxi, turning it off in furious tears as she threw herself on the bed. She brought it to life, and there, sure enough were Jade's calls. Half a dozen, no message left. She cursed herself for not having answered, but she'd been too angry. And then Jade had called the house to see if she was okay. That didn't sound like she was mad. That sounded like… concern? Of course there was always the possibility that her story was a sham for her mom's benefit, that really she'd been hoping to get Tori to answer and somehow rip her ears off through the phone, but maybe not.

She tumbled down the stairs into the kitchen, ignoring the banging in her head, just as her mom was about to leave. "Mom?"

"Hi, honey. Did you want me to pick you up something?"

"No, it just... When Jade called last night, how did she sound?"

Holly Vega considered this. "Well, she was very polite," she said. "She didn't sound at all like the awful girl you're always complaining about."

"No, I mean, how did she _sound_? What kind of mood was she in?"

"I don't know," Holly said. "Concerned? Worried?"

"Really?"

"Wait, did you two fight again?" Holly said, suspiciously. "You know, Tori, I've told you about letting your temper run away with you. You get that from your father's side."

"Me?" Tori said, incredulously. "I don't have a temper! She's always the one who-"

"Ah, ah," Holly scolded. "Nobody likes a tattletale. You leave the poor girl alone."

"But-"

"I _said_ , nobody likes a tattletale. Now," Holly picked up her bag, "did you want anything?"

"No," Tori said, miserably. She slumped on the counter. Her mom set great store by politeness. Even the arrival of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse wouldn't fluster her as long as they wiped their feet and called her _ma'am_.

With her mom gone, that left her to the tender mercies of Trina, who knew trouble when she saw it fall out of bed in a panic.

"So, what did you fight about?"

Tori groaned. "We didn't fight."

"Right."

"We didn't!" Tori said. "It's just... complicated."

"It must be," Trina said. "Because you went out to a party she wasn't even at, and then for some reason she's calling you at one in the morning, and now you're in a foul mood." Her expression softened. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Tori looked at her. She was always surprised by the way Trina could switch her personality on and off, be brusque and uncaring one minute, and then almost like a real sister the next. She thought about confessing everything to her, and then she thought about whether she really wanted the entire school and most of L.A. to hear about her indiscretion, and decided against it. "No," she sighed. "I'm going back upstairs."

"Suit yourself."

.

.

She lay on her bed. She felt calmer now, less agitated by the thought of disgrace. If Jade really _had_ called to see if she was okay, then there was always the possibility that she was willing to keep it between them. But this new clarity only served to highlight the true horror of what she'd done. She'd always wanted to be friends with Jade, not just because she found her interesting and, in the moments when she let her guard down, fun to be around, but because ever since she'd started at Hollywood Arts she'd craved female friendship, someone to hang out with. Trina was okay, but she was her older sister and there were things she'd never dare tell her, and talking to Cat was like trying to find a needle of reality in a haystack of nonsense. What she wanted was a peer, someone like her, someone she could relate to. Someone she could slump on the sofa next to and share secrets with. The kind of friend you saw on TV, or in teen movies. Of course, at first glance Jade had seemed an unlikely candidate, but there was _something_ there, and in the less hectic moments when Jade had forgotten about whatever feud was going on and treated her like a real, honest-to-goodness human being, Tori could see a friendship growing.

The problem with Jade was that you had to start from scratch every time. She'd think she was getting somewhere, and then the next day they were right back to square one, bickering again. But after a while she'd come to suspect that maybe that _was_ Jade's idea of friendship, that she didn't know any other way to be, and for every time she said _'I don't want to, but I will'_ what she actually meant was _'I'd love to, thanks'_. Because when it came down to it, Jade was willing to spend a heck of a lot of time with someone she supposedly couldn't stand, and with a little mellowing on her side and some toughening up on Tori's side, it seemed possible, just possible, that she'd found the friend she'd always wanted.

And now she'd blown it all sky high by telling her she loved her. Dang it.

No, _'Dang it'_ wasn't going to cover it. She put her pillow over head and said, very quietly, _'Fuck'_. Then she said it again, a little louder.

She stopped herself. _Did_ she love her? It had seemed so obvious at the party, but maybe she was just confusing her desperation with attraction. She tried to think back to the girls from Sherwood. Had she ever felt like this about any of them? She tried to imagine trudging a mile and a half through thick snow to tell Amanda Goodman she loved her. No dice. In fact if she was honest, she couldn't remember feeling like this about anyone, ever.

Crap. She needed to talk to Jade. She needed that very badly. She stared at her phone. It seemed annoyingly ironic that last night, when she didn't want to speak to her, Jade was all over it. Now that she did, there was silence. She tried to muster a little annoyance, a sense of injustice at Jade's refusal to call, but no amount of mental gymnastics could make it anything other than her responsibility to make the next move. Jade must know that she'd deliberately shut her off. Which only made it worse.

Was she hurt? Annoyed? Amused? Horrified?

She should call. No, wait, it was too early to call. Jade seemed like the kind of person who slept late, she decided, she wouldn't appreciate being woken up. Okay, leave it a while. But call.

Definitely call.

.

.

.

She trailed listlessly towards the bathroom to take a shower. In the depths of misery, every task seemed like an ordeal, every bottle felt like it weighed a ton, every turn of the tap an exercise in futility. Her arms and legs had no strength, and in the end she simply sat down hugging her knees and let the water run over her, her hair strewn across her face. What was the point in being clean, in being presentable, what was the point in anything, when you'd ruined your life?

It dawned on her that she was being a little melodramatic. This kind of thing must happen all the time. What was the worst thing that could happen? What was the worst-case scenario? She felt her stomach lurch. The worst case scenario was walking into school tomorrow to find a grinning Jade surrounded by all their friends sniggering at her, or maybe a punch in the face. But on the assumption Jade was willing to not murder her, or at least not murder her reputation, then what? The worst case was that Jade would be cold with her, awkward, that every attempt to talk to her or get close to her would result in a knowing look or an icy _'don't touch me'_. That Jade would find her repulsive.

So what was the best-case scenario? The best-case scenario was simply that the worst-case scenario didn't happen, that Jade wouldn't tell anyone, and that she wouldn't freeze Tori out. There was always the faint glimmer of hope that it might bring them closer together, that Jade might find she liked her more, or at least moderate her teasing knowing how Tori felt about her, but she wouldn't bet her life on it.

She closed her eyes. She didn't dare even think about the _very_ best case scenario, that one that sent shivers down her spine - that Jade would take her quietly to one side, slip a hand into hers, and say _'I like you too'_.

So what was the next move? She remembered seeing a bumper sticker, WWJD. _What Would Jesus Do?_ Or in this case, What Would Jade Do? If Jade had come over, drunk, and made a confession, how would she handle it?

Well, she'd either stare Tori in the eye and say _'Yeah? What of it?_ ' before walking off, or….

Or she'd deny it. Jade could deny things with a vehemence that made Saint Peter look like an amateur. She'd once denied she'd stolen Tori's phone while she was actually sat there in front of her _using_ it, as though reality was just a matter of opinion.

Denial. That was the answer. She couldn't deny she'd gone over there, she couldn't deny that she'd told her she liked her, she couldn't really deny that she'd ignored all her calls. But she could deny that she'd _meant_ it. She'd been drunk, people say stupid stuff all the time when they're drunk. Half the people at the party had probably told each other that they loved them, sometime during the night. It wasn't like she'd slept with anyone. So that was it. She'd talk to Jade before school, laugh it off, take whatever was coming to her, and hope to get away with a roll of the eyes and a pithy put-down.

She picked up the phone and pulled up Jade's number. She took a deep breath as her finger hovered over the call button. Five seconds. She'd press it in five seconds. _Five... four... three... two..._ No wait, five seconds was too short. What kind of a countdown was five seconds? Ten seconds, that was more like it. Right, here we go.

.

.

.

The screen locked just as she reached zero. Damn it. Maybe a countdown wasn't the way to go, it was too stressful. _Time_ , that was it. She looked at the clock. Nearly eleven. At eleven o'clock she'd call, simple as that. She'd glance up, notice it was eleven, and just do it, without even thinking about it.

.

.

.

Eleven came and went. Eleven was too formal, she decided. No one calls exactly on the hour. Ten past, that was more casual.

Twenty past.

 _Half past._ This was no good. "Trina!" she yelled down the stairs.

"What?"

"Could you help me?"

Trina stomped up the stair ungraciously. "What?"

"Could you just dial Jade's number for me?"

"Me? Why?"

"My hands are... dirty."

"You just took a shower."

"Please?"

Trina sighed, and took the phone, punching at it as though she thought Jade could feel it at the other end. "It's ringing."

"Give it to me!" She snatched it back and shoved her sister out of the door. "Go! Go!"

She slammed the door shut and waited breathlessly. But there was no answer. But she'd broken her impasse so she hung up and called again. Voicemail. She'd leave a voicemail. Perfect. She wouldn't even have to speak to Jade, just tell her how it was.

_Hey, hi. It's Vega. I mean Tori. Look, I'm really sorry about last night, I was at the party and I'd had a couple of drinks - well, more than a couple really, I was kinda drunk - and I was was all mellow and fuzzy, and when you texted, I just felt really bad for you, you know, stuck over there on your own, sick and everything, and I think I got a little… confused. I mean you do, sometimes, don't you, about how you feel about things? Like when you're in a night club dancing and you tell people this is the best song ever, because you're just lost in the moment, and you think you want to dance to that one song for the rest of your life. Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, I said a whole bunch of things that made sense at the time, but now I realize were totally, I mean, totally, not true. So I know it was pretty embarrassing, and I don't want things to be weird at school, so I was kind of hoping that we could maybe catch up tomorrow and have a laugh about it, or go for a coffee, or maybe you could just hit me with something if it makes you feel better, and then we can forget all about it. Okay, bye._

There was a beep, and Tori realized that none of those words had actually made it out of her mouth. She dialed again.

But this time there was nothing, just a network message. Jade's phone was off.

.

.

.

Jade felt like death, and not in a good way. Last night's antics had left her with a head full of phlegm so she'd loaded up on as many painkillers as she'd dared and now she lay in a haze, buried under the covers, hoping that she'd be fit for school in the morning. Not that she was looking forward to it, but she was going to let some stupid bug tell her what to do. Tori hadn't called, either, that was another reason she had to go to school. She groaned and burrowed deeper, pressing her face into the pillow, letting herself drift off into a fitful sleep. On the floor, under her bag, her phone buzzed, briefly, but she was too far gone to hear it, and a noisy snore soon drowned it out altogether. A few seconds later its screen flared briefly, and the battery died.

.

.

.

Crap. That wasn't a good sign. Tori toyed with the idea of just going over there like she had last night, but in the cold light of day, without the glow of the alcohol, it seemed a far less attractive prospect. There had to be another way, one that didn't involve having to face her. She could email her, but there always the chance that Jade wouldn't check, or just see her name and delete it. What else? What did people do before they had phones?

A letter. Of course. She'd write a letter and take it over there, slip it in when nobody was looking. No one can resist opening a letter, can they? Especially not a mysterious, hand-delivered one. That was it, she'd write a letter. She went downstairs, retrieved a sheet of paper from the printer, and sat down at her desk, uncapping her pen with a flourish. So, where to begin?

.

_Dear Jade…_

_._

_._

_._

_._

_._

**So, will Jade be impressed by Tori's letter? Will she read it and agree to forget the whole thing? Or will the dog eat it in a shocking twist? Find out next week.**


	4. Worth a Thousand Words

**Hi, welcome back. I know I left this to fester for a while, because if I'm honest it was only ever going to be a one-shot, and I had no idea what to do with it, but I've decided to fire it up again, give it an oil-change and a re-spray, and hit the road in a slightly different direction, hopefully with a destination on mind.**

**We're also going to have a little less inner turmoil and wistful pining, and a little more stuff actually happening.**

**And when I say 'stuff', I mean, of course, pointless bickering.**

.

.

.

Had Jade felt a little less like death, things might have gone better. Had she had anything else in her head beside mucus and painkillers, she might have paused to consider. But as it was her irritation levels were pegging the needle and her tolerance was at an all-time low.

Tori bounded up the steps of Hollywood Arts with a certain enthusiasm. She'd written her letter - well, she'd written a lot of letters, her floor was covered in screwed up balls of paper, but she'd finally come up with a draft she could live with - and snuck out of the house. She hadn't dared involve Trina, so she'd had to walk all the way over to Jade's house, hunched up against the cold, dressed all in black as befitted her secretive mission, to slip the envelope through the door. So now she pushed open the door and breezed confidently into school, straight into the line of fire.

"What the hell is this?" Jade demanded, thrusting something in her face.

"Er.. what?"

"This, Tori, this." Jade waved the object impatiently. Tori took a step back to see that she was holding up a piece of paper covered in squiggly writing that she recognized as her own.

"It's a letter."

"I can see it's a letter, Tori. It's clearly a letter. I mean what's in it."

"Well, I just thought that maybe, after the other night, I should explain."

"Explain?" Jade said. "This is your explanation is it? You felt _sorry_ for me?"

"Yes."

"Bullshit."

"Jade!"

"You know, one of the things I've always liked about you, Tori, is your honesty. The way you just put yourself out there. I kind of admired you for having the guts to come over, to just turn up and tell me that. And now you're covering your ass by giving me this pile of crap?"

"It's not crap!"

"So you just made all that up after the party?"

"I was drunk!"

"In vino veritas, Tori."

"Don't get all smart-ass with me! It was a party, I was drunk, and people were being mean about your text, so-"

"So you just thought, 'I know, I'll head on over to Jade's house and give her a cheap thrill by pretending I like her'."

"I wasn't..." She snatched the letter, angrily. "You know what would have been the decent thing to do, Jade? The _kind_ thing? The thing that any other human being in the world other than you would have done?"

"Well, I-"

"To believe it, Jade! Or even to just _pretend_ you believed it! To be gracious, to spare my feelings, to just say, _I understand, forget it_ , and get on with things. But you couldn't do that, could you? You couldn't bring yourself to be nice about it because you're so far up your own butt that you couldn't bear the idea of being pitied. You'd rather it was true because that panders to your big, fat ego, but you're not willing to offer anything back, are you? Ever. Not even a little bit of consideration. You want to know the truth? Yes, yes I did like you. For one brief, fleeting moment, I thought I saw something in you, because I was kind of drunk and I thought things could be different. Well thank you for opening my eyes. If I ever was deluded enough to think I liked you, I sure as hell don't now."

"Tori!"

But it was too late. Tori fled, tears stinging her eyes, leaving Jade alone in the closet.

.

.

.

Two weeks. The tension lasted for two weeks.

Nothing was said, there were no arguments, no bickering, just a tacit understanding that where one was, the other couldn't be. If Jade was sat at a table, Tori would take a different table; if Tori was talking to Andre in the hall, Jade wouldn't even slow down to acknowledge him. And every time it happened, their eyes would lock, briefly, with enough animosity to stun anyone passing between them. To Tori, seething with embarrassment, Jade's attitude was exactly what she should have expected, the arrogance, the lack of any kind of empathy with her situation. She felt betrayed, as though the girl that she'd felt so strongly about the night of the party had let her down by disappearing and leaving her to face _this_ Jade, and she cursed herself for ever having been stupid enough to think she'd let it go.

For her part, Jade couldn't see where she was wrong. What had Tori expected? If she'd waited one damned minute before going off on a tirade, Jade might have got around to saying all the things that Tori wanted, that she understood, that she was a little flattered, that she'd keep it to themselves. But Tori had tried to brush it off, and if there was one thing Jade hated, it was being brushed off.

And so it went on, the never-ending dance, each orbiting the other, equally convinced of their own righteousness.

But there was a difference. After each close encounter, Tori would look around and see expressions of sympathy. Jade looked around to see only accusations.

"What did you do?" Beck demanded, yet again, as Tori sailed past with her tray, shooting an angry glance in their direction. They'd been back together less than a week.

"I didn't do anything!"

"Right."

"What, you don't believe me?"

Beck wavered between honesty and self-preservation. "Well _something_ must have happened," he said. "You two have never been like this before."

Jade gritted her teeth. She could explain, but then she'd be opening up a whole can of worms that neither of them wanted wriggling around the school. "It'll blow over."

"You could always apologize."

"I don't need to apologize!"

"Then at least talk to her."

"Fine."

.

.

.

Tori closed her locker door to reveal an stone-faced Jade. She made to move away, but Jade grabbed her arm. "This has got to stop."

"What?"

"This. All this."

"I don't know what you mean."

"Yes you do! It's not _fair_ , Tori," Jade said, angrily. "Everyone thinks I've done something terrible to you, and I can't tell them what's going on without blowing your little secret. I'm being treated like a criminal and I haven't even _done_ anything."

"So what do you want me to do?" Tori snapped back. "You want me to tell everyone, is that it? You want me to embarrass myself in front of our friends to get you off the hook?"

"Well, no, but-"

"Right, fine," Tori said, and stomped out of the hall towards the café.

.

.

.

Beck, Andre and Cat were sitting at their usual table, or at least their usual _pre-Tori-and-Jade-falling-out-and-making-everyone's-life-a-misery_ table, when a wild-eyed Tori approached. She paused in front of them, and seethed for a moment.

"You guys want to know?" she demanded. "Hmm? You guys want to know why me and Jade are arguing?"

"Er..."

"I'll tell you why. You remember the party? On New Year's Eve? Well-"

"Yeah, _you_ all remember the party."

There was an acid drip to the voice. Tori turned in surprise, to find Jade coming up behind her. "Jade..."

"You know, the party where you all ignored me."

There was a general guilty shuffling of feet. They'd already paid the price for this one. The first week back had been hell. "Anyway," Jade went on. "Tori wasn't supposed to be there, she was grounded. But I didn't know that, so I called her house, 'cause I was kind of sick and not thinking straight, not that any of _you_ guys cared," she said, pointedly, "and I kind of blew it with her mom by telling her where she'd gone. So now she's in trouble."

Seconds ticked by as Tori processed this, her lips moving as she tried it out for plausibility. "That's... right!" she said, brightly, turning back to the others. "That's exactly right. That's what happened. That's just it. What she said. Yes."

Beck raised his eyebrows. "So that's it?" he said. "That's all you've been fighting about all this time?"

"Yeah. But now we're all good, aren't we?" She nudged Tori.

"Hmm? Oh, yeah. All good," Tori agreed. Andre frowned.

"I thought you said your mom gave you a ride to the par-"

"I _said_ , we're all good," Jade said, sharply. Andre shrugged. The bell rang.

"I guess we've got to go," Beck said. "Catch you later." He gave Jade a brief peck on the cheek and the three non-combatants headed back into the school, leaving Jade and Tori alone.

Tori sank down onto the bench, sagging with relief, as Jade perched cautiously next to her, and they sat in silence.

"Thank you," Tori said, finally.

Jade shrugged. "I really am sorry, okay?" she said. "I acted badly the first day back, I was feeling like shit and I wasn't thinking straight. I understand sometimes you get a passing thing for someone, even if it's only a moment of madness, I mean, look at the way we acted around Moose. And I was pretty flattered that it might have been me, even if it only lasted until I opened my big mouth."

Tori was about to protest, but Jade cut her off. "But I'm _also_ ," she said, quickly, "pretty open to the idea that you just felt sorry for me, and I guess I should be grateful for that, too." She reddened slightly. "Sorry. I'm not good with that kind of thing."

Tori smiled at her discomfort. "I guess not. So, could we just forget all this and move on?"

"Sounds good to me."

"And are we still friends?"

"Wait, we were friends?"

"Jade..."

"Okay, fine. We're friends."

"Good." Tori reached out to take Jade's hand and give it a squeeze. She realized what she was doing, and began to pull it back, but Jade put her other hand on top to hold it there, and for a few seconds they sat, hand in hand, in comfortable silence. A perfect moment.

_The simulated sound of a shutter, a throwback to another age, to the time when cameras were mechanical, cumbersome, when they couldn't be slipped out of a pocket unseen._

A perfect moment, c _aptured_.

.

.

.

The photograph itself might not have aroused much attention had it been pasted into a scrapbook, or part of a collage. But as it circulated, people began to add to it, hearts, flowers, speech bubbles, until it became a meme in its own right. The first Jade became aware of it was when she noticed a group of freshmen crowded around a phone. They looked up and sniggered.

"What?"

They said nothing, but hurried off down the corridor. She shook her head, and headed towards her locker, to find a picture stuck to the door. She stared at it. Her and Tori, holding hands, gazing at each other like a pair of soppy love-struck idiots. Around it someone had digitally added a large, pink heart-shaped frame, and on top of it someone had scrawled 'Awwww!' in green sharpie.

She felt her blood boil. She snatched it from the door and set off in search of someone to take it out on.

"Have you seen this?" she demanded of Beck. Beck, it turned out, had seen it. He'd seen quite a lot of it. His phone had been beeping all day with different variations of the picture, and he was in no mood to see another one.

"Yeah," he said, sourly. "You two look very cozy."

"We were just making up!" Jade said.

"Up or out?"

"Don't try and be funny. We were just being friends."

"You don't see pictures of me and Andre holding hands."

"That's different!" she protested. "You're guys. And you know what Tori's like, she's all… touchy-feely."

Beck raised an eyebrow, to indicate that 'touchy' and 'feely' were not words he wanted to think about right now, particular not in relation to this picture.

"Ugh." She left him and went to find Tori.

"Have you seen this?" she said again. Tori, who looked as though she'd been dreading this moment since the day she was born, nodded, miserably. "It's all over the school."

"What?"

"On the Slap, on the noticeboards," Tori said. "There's even one in the girls' room." She shuddered. "You don't even want to know what that one says."

"Right," Jade said, furiously. "This had got to stop. I'm going to find out who did this and-"

"There's no point," Tori sighed. " Everybody did it, Jade. It's just been going around."

"Oh, and you're all right with that, are you?"

"No, of course I'm not all right with it!" Tori said, testily. "But what are you going to do? You can't beat up every kid who forwards a picture. Just leave it alone. It'll pass. By tomorrow everyone will have moved on."

Jade stood, steaming, but Tori's logic was right. If she made a big deal of it, it would only get worse. Better just to forget it.

.

.

.

Beck found it harder to forget. "I look like an idiot."

"Tori says to leave it alone and it'll pass."

"Yeah, well that's easy for her to say. She not the one who looks like his girlfriend's cheating on him."

"Jesus. No one seriously believes that, Beck. It's just a joke."

"And how would you feel if everyone was 'joking' about me and Meredith?"

Meredith was still a sore subject. "That's a pretty low blow, Beck Oliver."

"Just saying. And I bet Meredith would be okay with it."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's that supposed to mean? You think Tori had something to do with this?"

He said nothing.

"Ten seconds, Beck. You've got ten seconds to take back whatever sick little conspiracy theory you've got going on and apologize."

"I'm just-"

"Nine."

"Okay, fine. But just try and see it from my point of view."

.

.

.

Two days and the rumors showed no signs of abating, although the sight of Jade prowling the corridors looking for culprits forced it underground. Jade really wanted to hang out with Beck, to counter the accusations, but Beck was now strangely reluctant to be seen with her, and so she found herself gravitating towards Tori, who could at least offer some comradeship. There was an odd comfort in the fact that, for once, they were both on the same side, the only difference being that while Jade was angry, Tori just looked worn-out.

But of course, that comradeship only fueled the fire.

"This is ridiculous," Jade muttered, ignoring a smirk from a passing student. "What the hell is their problem? I don't get why they'd care."

"They care because it's us," Tori said, wearily.

"What do you mean?"

"You and me."

"What difference does that make?"

"Because we've spent the last two years fighting," Tori said. "The idea that we'd end up dating is just too..."

"Stupid for words?"

"Ironic, I was going to say. But yes, 'stupid' covers it too."

There was movement behind them.

"Hey there!"

Jade groaned. _Sinjin_. Never a pleasure, always a chore. "What do you want?"

"I was sorry to hear about you and Beck."

"What about me and Beck?"

"You guys splitting up. And I just want to say that if you ever need a shoulder to cry on, I'm your man."

"There are so many things wrong with that sentence I don't know where to start," Jade said. "What do you mean, splitting up? We haven't... oh, right. Look, the photos are just a prank, okay? Someone's messing with us." She frowned. "Although if it _was_ true, it's pretty insensitive for you to come over here hustling in on me and my new girlfriend, so go screw yourself."

"A prank?" Sinjin frowned. "But Beck said..." He trailed off as Jade turned to look at him. "I'd better go."

"Beck said what?" she demanded.

"Sorry, I've really got to get to class. I'm going to be late."

"Damn right you're going to be late," Jade growled, "as in, 'the late Sinjin Van Cleef', if you don't tell me what he said."

"He just said you two were on a break," Sinjin squeaked, shrinking back.

"A break?" Jade said, outraged. "We're not on a break!"

"Don't hurt me."

"I'm not going to..." But it was too late; Sinjin had bolted, leaving Jade to stew in her anger. "Right, that's it," she said.

"What are you going to do?" Tori asked.

"Who the hell does he think he is? No one gets to be on a break with me. Not unless I say so."

"I'm not sure that's how dating works, Jade."

"And what the hell would you know about it, Little Miss Singleton?"

"Hey! I have had boyfriends, you know."

"Sorry. I'm just warming up."

"I understand. You've got to get into the 'zone'."

"Damn right. So," Jade rubbed her hands together, "where was I?"

"You were going to kill Beck."

"Oh, yeah. Okay, see you later."

.

.

.

"We're on a break?" she demanded as she appeared in front of Beck's car, sending his admirers scattering for cover.

"Uh, yeah," Beck rubbed the back of his neck, as he always did when he was nervous. "About that. I was going to tell you..."

"Oh, were you?" she fumed. "Well that's pretty fucking generous of you. Please, don't feel you need to rush these things, any time will do. Hell, why don't you just send me a note by carrier pigeon, or pin it to back of a passing camel, or maybe you could just scratch it on the back of a tortoise and tell it to take the long way round, because there's no reason I'd need to know sooner than fucking Sinjin that my own boyfriend's dumping me!"

"I'm not dumping you!" Beck protested. "I just think, while all this is going on, that maybe we should take a break."

"Yeah, right. So you don't have to look bad because your girlfriend's a-"

"Shhh!"

"Don't 'shhh' me, Beck Oliver! Right that's it. You want a break, you've got a break. Just count yourself lucky it's not your neck."

.

.

.

"So how did it go?" Tori asked. She was sitting on the steps as the other girl returned and dropped down next to her.

"Well, it wasn't my best work," Jade said, modestly, "But I think I got my point across."

"So you guys are back together?"

"No, we're on a break."

"I thought you said-"

"I said, he doesn't get to decide. Now _I've_ decided we're on a break. Permanently."

"Oh. Okay, well, if that's what you want." Tori made to get up. "I guess I'd better get to-"

"Where the hell do you think you're going?"

"To class."

"Hey, I've just broken up with my boyfriend. It's your job to stay here and give me sympathy."

"Why me?"

"Because no one else will," Jade said, honestly.

"I'm sure Cat-"

"Ahem."

Tori rolled her eyes. "Right, fine," she said. She reached out and patted Jade on the head, twice. "There, there," she intoned. "Everything's going to be all right." She took her hand back, leaving Jade's hair slightly disheveled. "Is that better?"

"I'm overwhelmed by your sincerity. I think I'm going to cry."

"Well you'd get a lot more sympathy if you hadn't been the one who dumped _him_."

"Hey, don't you take his side," Jade said. "He practically accused you of setting all this up."

"Me?" Tori said, puzzled. "Why would he... Oh, God. You didn't tell him about New Year's Eve, did you?"

"No of course I didn't tell him."

"Then why would he think it was me?"

"I don't know, Tori. Maybe because it's just the kind of dumb-ass scheme you usually come up with."

"My schemes are not dumb-ass!"

"Paying a guy to date me?"

"Okay, some of them are," Tori conceded. "But not this one."

"So it _was_ you?"

"Tori sighed, and rested her head lightly in her hands. "Yes, Jade," she said, patiently. "Of course it was. Because everyone knows that the way to a girl's heart is through crippling humiliation."

"...You know, you've got a very sarcastic tone, sometimes, Tori Vega."

"Me?"

"You need to work on that. Learn to be more of a people person, like me."

"Ha!"

"So, you want to skip next class and grab a coffee?"

Tori hesitated. "I don't know, I really-"

"Dickers is taking it."

"Let's go."

.

.

.

And so the two of them found themselves spending even _more_ time together, and in other circumstances both of them might, in hindsight, have come to see 'Photogate' as a good thing, as a gentle nudge towards real friendship. But Fate decided to intervene. And it did so in the form of the new Principal, Mr. Jennings.

Mr. Jennings had been at the school for almost a month, and so far no one had noticed. A mild-mannered man, he'd found himself surrounded by a staff and student body of prodigious talent and personality, and, having no talent of his own to speak of other than a remarkable capacity for collecting green pens, and the personality of a wet dishcloth, he'd failed to make his mark. But no longer. Because now Mr. Jennings had found himself a crusade.

He was going to make a speech in the Asphalt Café. It wasn't compulsory to attend, because Mr. Jennings would never do anything as terribly authoritarian as demand anything, but he let it be known that the food truck wouldn't open until he'd finished, and he was prepared to wait a _long_ time for stragglers.

"Here at Hollywood Arts," he began, "we pride ourselves on our individuality. That's why we're here. We celebrate each other's talents, we encourage diversity. We tolerate our differences, because we know more than most what it's like to be unique. To be special."

"What the hell does _he_ know about being special?" Jade grumbled.

"Shh," Tori said. "I'm listening to this."

"Of course you are," Jade said. She folded her arms on the table, laid her head on them, and closed her eyes.

It turned out that 'diversity' and 'tolerance' were very much Mr. Jennings' thing. Jade didn't bother keeping count of the number of times he brought them up, but if this had been a drinking game she'd have been having her stomach pumped by now.

"… which is why it pains me to discover that we have in our midst a campaign of bigotry, an attack on the principles we hold dear."

Jade started to pay a little more attention. There were in a performing arts school in the most liberal state in America, it was hard to see exactly what kind of prejudice was running riot through the halls. All she could make out through the bluster was that there was something about a couple getting victimized for being gay, which didn't seem very likely. In fact as far as she was aware, the only people getting a hard time right now were her and Tori, what with the whole stupid… picture… thing… _Oh, God._

"… an attempt to smear two young people who have done nothing more than express their love for each other…"

_No, that couldn't be right. No, no, no._ The Principal definitely had Jade's attention now. And Tori's, who was staring at him in horror.

"Who are we," he went on, "to judge others? Who are we to say what's right? Who are we to mock and belittle those who don't conform to what society demands?"

He was looking right at them, hand outstretched in a gesture of sincerity, and there was no doubt who he was talking about. "These two young girls…"

"Oh, my God," Tori gasped. "He's going to out us!"

"You're going to 'out' us in a minute!" Jade hissed. "Shut up!"

But it was too late. Their response had identified them as the target of Mr. Jennings munificence, and now everyone was looking at them, some curious, some nudging each other and whispering, some grinning. Jade closed her eyes. It was all a dream. All a bad dream. Across the table, Beck got up and left, his face like thunder.

And then Cat, who hadn't been listening at all and thought Mr. Jennings was congratulating them for something, began to clap. Someone else picked it up, then another, and, as the ripple of applause grew louder, the Principal, having long since learned the lesson that where the crowd go, the leader must follow, joining in enthusiastically in the hope of pretending he started it. Jade opened her eyes and looked around, aghast.

"They're cheering, Tori," she muttered through clenched teeth. "Why are they cheering?"

"Just go with it," Tori whispered.

"What?" She looked at Tori, who was sporting her most winning smile, eyelids fluttering in modest acceptance of their adulation. "Are you out of your mind?"

"Just _do_ it."

Jade rolled her eyes, helpless to object. Nothing made sense anymore. She managed to muster up a wan smile, and nodded in acknowledgement. Eventually Mr. Jennings, satisfied he'd saved the day, gave them a cheery wave and left, and as the hubbub began to die down, the food truck opened its shutters and students began to wander away, leaving only Cat, Andre, Jade and Tori at the table. Cat, unaware that anything out of the ordinary had happened, began to hum as she pulled out a coloring book, and Andre seemed to have suffered some kind of seizure, rendering him incapable of doing anything but opening and closing his mouth as he stared at them. When she judged they were no longer the center of attention, Jade stood up, grabbed Tori by the arm, and leaned close to her ear.

"Could I have a word, _sweetheart_ ," she growled. "Somewhere in private."

.

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**So what do you think? I know it's not the most original plot, but I'm hoping we can still have some fun with it. If you like it, let me know. If not, rest assured VoltageStone's excellent version is also back up and running (and probably makes more sense).**

**I'm going to try and keep this and 'Green Eyes' going at the same time, unless there's a strong preference for one or the other.**


	5. Definitely Not

**Okay, I'm going to be honest with you. I've never actually attended a Hollywood performing arts academy. Astonishing, I know, what with my meticulous attention to detail and rigorous geographical accuracy. Anyway I have absolutely no idea how Tori and Jade's situation would go down in reality, so forgive me if it sounds far-fetched.**

**.**

.

.

'Private' meant the janitor's closet.

"What the hell are you doing?" Jade said, slamming the door behind them.

"Solving our problem."

"What?"

"Look," Tori said, "he just a made a whole speech about tolerance and understanding, and everyone thought it was great. They thought _we_ were great. And you were going to just stand up in the middle of it and say, 'thanks a lot, Mr. Jennings, but we're not a couple?"

"Yes."

"And how's that going to look? People will think we're ashamed of it."

"I am!"

"You'd be ashamed to be gay?"

"No, I'd be ashamed to be seen dating you."

"Well, that's not very nice."

"I'm not a very nice person. I'm surprised you're so keen to date me."

"Oh, come on. Don't you get it? Most people were on our side. So now no one's going to want to be the odd one out and look like a bigot when they know that public opinion's against them. The whole thing'll die down in a couple of days."

"And then what?"

"And then we just quietly let it drop. It's high school, Jade. No one expects couples to stay together."

Jade's brow furrowed as she followed Tori's logic, looking for the flaw. She folded her arms, and tapped her foot.

"A few days?" she said, eventually.

"A few days. That's all. Trust me."

"Okay." She made to leave. "But just so you know," she said, "I'm only doing this to piss Beck off."

"I hear you, girlfriend."

"Don't push it. A couple of days, no more. And on the condition that we don't make a big deal out of it, or draw attention to ourselves. Keep it low-key."

.

.

.

But low-key wasn't going to do it. Tori had been right, it wasn't so much what they were, it was _who_ they were. It was like walking into church one day to find that Lucifer and the Almighty had patched things up and were making out on the altar, it was all kinds of wrong, and people were fascinated.

"Here we go again," Jade muttered, as they walked out towards the Asphalt Cafe.

"Just relax," Tori said.

"That's easy for you to say."

"Oh, come on, you're the actress. Act."

"Okay. But I am not holding your hand."

"I didn't ask you to-"

"Okay, fine." Jade grabbed Tori by the hand. "But just this once."

"But I-"

"Come on."

Jade felt a little calmer with Tor's hand in hers. In truth, she didn't like to be touched, which had always made sex a little awkward, but somehow Tori was the exception to the rule. The feel of her skin felt soothing, calming, like a cool breeze on a hot summer's day. They walked stiffly to their usual table, ignoring the glances and whispers.

"This is stupid," Jade grumbled. "The whole damned school's talking about us."

"No they're not," Tori said, airily. "People have hardly noticed."

"Yeah, right. If I hear one more-"

"Hi."

They turned to see a blonde-haired girl that Tori vaguely recognized as a freshman from one of her dance classes. "Oh, hi," she said.

The girl seemed a little nervous. "I just wanted to say that... I think it's really great, what you're doing."

Tori turned to Jade, who shrugged, mystified. She looked back at the girl.

"Us?"

"You know, just being yourselves. Being totally open about it. I think it's really cool."

Tori's heart sank as she heard a low growl from behind her. "Er..."

"And I want you to know that if it hadn't been for you guys, I'd never have been brave enough to tell everyone about..." The girl moved to one side, and Tori craned her neck to see a young girl a few feet away with short dark hair and glasses. She smiled and gave them a shy wave. Tori waved back. She looked at the blonde girl, questioningly.

"Theresa," she said. "We've been together a couple of months but we didn't really feel like we could say anything. Then you guys came out, and everyone was like, wow, that's cool, so we thought, why not?"

"That's... nice." Tori could feel Jade's thermal glare on the back of her head.

"So, anyway, I just wanted to thank you for standing up for us all and not taking any crap with the bullying and stuff. You guys rock. You're like role-models." She turned to go. "Keep up the good work," she said with a wink, and wandered away, hand in hand with her companion.

Tori watched her go for a while, mainly because she didn't dare turn round. "Well, how about that," she said, weakly. "We're role models."

"I am going to kill, you, Tori Vega. I am going to kill you, slowly, and painfully."

Tori closed her eyes. This was going to take a while.

"I am going to rip you limb from limb, grind you up into very tiny pieces, and feed you to the fish."

"Jade..."

"Then I'm going to feed the fish to the cat," Jade went on, warming to her theme, "kill the cat, bury it in quicklime, and sing comic songs on its grave. And when I've finished doing that, when every molecule of you has been thoroughly stomped into dust and mocked until my lungs are sore, I'm going to devote the rest of my life to science."

"Science?"

"Yes, science," Jade snapped. "So that one day, Tori, _one_ day, after years of research, and countless gory but enjoyable experiments on cute fluffy animals, I can build a great big fricking laboratory, dunk your remains in a tank, and send fifty thousand volts through your rotten, stinking carcass to bring it back to life _so I can kill you all over again, even more slowly, and even more painfully_."

"Oh, hush," Tori said, flapping a hand dismissively. "You hate science."

"I could learn to love it," Jade muttered, "given the right motivation."

"Anyway, you can't bring me back to life if you've ground me into fish food. That's not going to work."

"I can try. God loves a trier."

"I think he'd make an exception in your case. So," Tori said, brightly, "what do you want to do tonight?"

"Not. Actually. Dating."

"I know, I just thought you might be bored, that's all."

"And hanging out with you helps with that, how, exactly?"

"No need to be snippy."

Jade fingered her scissors. "Don't tempt me."

"Ok, fine. Forget it."

They sat in silence for a moment."

"I'll pick you up at eight."

"Really?"

"Dress nice."

.

.

.

"Only us, Tori. Only you and me," Jade said. They were driving through the night, destination unknown, at least to Tori. "In the whole history of mankind, only we have to sneak away so we can _not_ be together."

"Don't be such a grouch," Tori said. She nudged Jade's knee, playfully. "If you play your cards right, maybe I'll let you _not_ get lucky later."

"Is that supposed to be funny?"

"I thought so. Anyway, I thought you'd like all this."

"What?"

"You know, the whole subterfuge thing. Fooling people. Acting. Lying."

"Yeah, I might like it," Jade said. "if I was actually getting something out of it, but there's nothing in for me, is there? I'm going along with it for your benefit."

"For my benefit?"

"Yeah. You seem way too keen on the whole idea. I'm beginning to wonder why."

The temperature in the car lowered a few degrees.

"Take me home."

"What?"

"Take me home."

"Why?"

"Because I know what you're implying," Tori said, "and if you really think I'm getting some kind of cheap thrill out of pretending we're together, then you're wrong. Take me home."

"No."

"What?"

"I'm not taking you home."

"You can't not take me home! Turn around."

"No."

"I'll jump!"

"Go ahead."

"I... we're going kind of fast."

"Yeah, we are."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to be late."

"Late for what?"

"We're here."

.

.

.

They pulled into a parking lot. There were a few other cars there, a few other very _expensive_ cars, Tori noticed. Jade stopped the car and got out, Tori following. She looked up at the dimly-lit building.

"What is this place?"

"Eduardo's," jade said. "Come on."

"This is…? Wait! Jade!"

"What is it?"

"I can't go in here!"

"Why not?"

"I only brought, like, twenty bucks," Tori protested. "And even if I'd brought my whole allowance, I can't afford this place. Heck, even if I'd sold a kidney it'd only get me an entrée."

"You don't have to pay for anything."

"You're paying?"

"No."

"Oh, God, please tell me we're not going to eat and run."

"Relax," Jade said. "My dad's a friend of the owner, did some work for him a couple of years ago. He always said that if I ever wanted a table on a quiet night he'd fix me up."

"So it's... free?" Tori said, warily.

"What, so now you're disappointed?" Jade said. "You know, we can always forget it and go find a burger joint if you really want to splurge your twenty bucks."

"No! No," Tori said quickly. "I'm good. Free's good."

"Then let's go."

"I wish I'd worn something better."

"You look fine."

"But-"

"Come on."

.

.

.

"Ah, Jade!" The owner greeted her with an avuncular smile and a roving eye. "How you've grown."

Jade pulled her coat a little closer over her chest. "Thanks."

"And I see you've brought a little friend."

"Have I?"

"Ahem."

"Oh, yeah. This is Tori. A friend from schoo... college."

"You're at college now? My, how the time flies. So let me guess, you must be around... twenty-one?"

"That's it," Jade said. "That's it exactly."

"Uh huh. So shall I send over the wine menu?"

"That would be great, thanks."

"I'll bet it would," said Eduardo, who wasn't born yesterday. "Sadly, Jade, your Uncle Eduardo is not quite so green as he looks."

"Rats."

He laughed. "Your father would never forgive me. How is he, by the way?"

Jade shrugged. "Cold and judgmental."

"But a genius with money. Well give him my regards," Eduardo said, waving them towards a table. "I'll have Dominic make you up the special."

.

.

.

The place had a sparse, minimalist look, all clean lines and razor-sharp edges, the stark austerity of modern wealth. The 'special', when it arrived, resembled a small modern art installation, and Tori was reluctant to touch it in case it collapsed and she had to pay for any damage. "This is nice," she said for the fifth time.

"Yeah." Jade was similarly cagey about her food. She prodded it with cedar-wood fork, and it made a little tinkling sound, like silver bells.

"Is the food usually this... interesting?"

"I don't know. I've never been here before."

"What?" Tori was surprised. "Why not? If I had a free table I'd be here every week."

"It's not a lifetime, all-you-can-eat buffet, Tori. It's just an occasional favor."

"So why haven't you been before?"

"I've never really had anyone to go with."

"What about Beck?"

Jade hesitated. "He wouldn't have appreciated it. Guys don't like this kind of place."

Tori looked around. "There are plenty of guys here."

"Yeah, but they're not here for fun. They'd all rather be home eating pizza in their underwear. This is the kind of place guys bring girls to show off, to try and impress them."

"So are you trying to impress me?"

"Are you calling me a guy?"

"Well no, but-"

"No, I'm not trying to impress you. If I was trying to impress you, I'd hardly have told you it was free, would I? I'd have lied and told you it was costing me a couple of hundred bucks."

"Maybe you were trying to impress me with your honesty."

"Yeah, right," Jade scoffed. "Who's impressed by honesty?"

"You are."

"What?"

"You said one of the things you admired about me was my honesty."

"When?"

"When we were... talking about the letter."

"Oh. Yeah. Well, that was before I knew what a devious little monster you were."

"What do you mean?"

" _Why, just go with it,"_ Jade mimicked, in a sing-song voice. " _Let's jes' pretend that lil' ol' me and lil' ol' you are dating, honeypie_."

"I don't talk like that."

"You do in my head."

"Then your head's wrong."

"My head is never wrong."

"So why me?"

"Hmm?"

"If this is your first time here. Why me?"

"Maybe I thought you _would_ appreciate it."

"I do. I think it's amazing."

"So what's the problem?"

"There isn't a problem. I'm just curious as to why I'm the only person you've ever invited."

"I didn't say you were the only person I'd ever bring. I just said you were the first."

"Oh."

"You see?" Jade said. "Haven't you ever heard the phrase, 'don't look a gift horse in the mouth'? You ask too many questions, and now you feel bad."

"You could have just lied."

"I thought you admired honesty?"

"No, that was you," Tori said. " _I_ want to be lied to, so I feel special."

"Okay, you want to know why we're here? Fine. One, we had to go somewhere I knew for a fact no one we know would see us, two, I thought if I fed you it might keep your mouth occupied so you wouldn't talk so much, and three, I've been giving you kind of a hard time over the whole 'dating' thing, when it wasn't really your fault, so this is my way of apologizing to try to make it up to you."

Jade looked up to find Tori staring at her, a forkful of food halfway to her mouth. "Okay, maybe I should have led with that one," she conceded. "But my point still stands."

"This is an apology?"

Jade shrugged. "Yeah."

"But… you must have arranged this before you told me what time you were picking me up."

"So?"

"Let me get this straight, you gave me all that grief at school today, all the time _knowing_ that you were planning on apologizing later?"

"Yeah, well," Jade said, uncomfortably, "I thought I might as well get my money's worth out of it."

Tori started to laugh, and clamped her hand over her mouth to stifle it.

"What?" Jade said, sharply. "What's funny?"

Tori just shook her head, not trusting herself to speak.

"Vega..."

"Nothing. It's just..." Tori gave up. "Forget it," she said. She cleared her throat. "I graciously accept your apology."

"Right," Jade said, grumpily. "Good."

"Although now I know it's an apology, it would mean more if you were actually paying for it."

"Do you want to be wearing that..." Jade jabbed her fork towards the object on Tori's plate, "whatever that is?"

"I'm just joking," Tori said, with a grin. "This is the best date I ever been on."

"This is not a date."

"A date-like occurrence. A fake date. An almost-date. A _not_ date."

That's better."

"And I've got to say you've got a lot higher standard of 'not dating' than Beck has."

"What do you mean?"

"He took me to a crappy seafood truck, where people got sick. This is much nicer."

"High praise indeed. I'll be sure to mention to Eduardo that his incredibly expensive restaurant just edges it over some rancid All-You-Can-Puke Clam-mobile. It'll make his day."

"No need to be touchy. I'm just saying."

"Anyway, it's not a competition between me and Beck to see who can take you on a better date."

"I know."

There was a pause.

"Although if it was," Jade said, "I'd totally win, right?"

Tori rolled her eyes. "Yes, you would."

"Good," Jade said, satisfied.

"Although some of it was kind of fun," Tori said casually, looking down and poking at her food. "Especially the beer bong and strip poker back at his place."

She looked up into a furious glare. "Kidding," she said.

"You'd better be. I've never actually killed anyone with a breadstick before."

"I don't know why you're so jealous, anyway. You know I don't like Beck that way."

"You must be the only one who doesn't."

There was a lull in the conversation as they tackled their food.

"Listen," Tori said, after a while, "about New Year's Eve…"

Jade groaned. "I thought we'd settled all that?"

"We have. But I just wanted to say that I really appreciate the fact that you called to see if I was okay. After I got home. That was really considerate, and I never thanked you."

"What else could I do?" Jade said. "I followed your footprints, but they just kind of disappeared, and I didn't know if-"

"Wait, you went out to _look_ for me?" Tori said.

Jade shrugged. "Yeah."

"In the snow? When you were sick?"

"Well, I..."

"Oh, _Jade_."

"Don't," Jade said. "Don't do that face. And that voice. That whole soppy 'concerned' look," Jade said, uncomfortably. "I only went out because if you were dead in the street somewhere the police would find you, and then they'd start nosing around and asking all kinds of awkward questions, and that would have been totally inconvenient for me. You know. What with me being sick, and everything." She sniffed, as though to demonstrate.

"Uh huh." Tori held her gaze for a moment, and then returned to her food.

"Fine," Jade said, when there no other response. "Maybe - maybe - I was slightly worried, all right? But that doesn't mean-"

"That you care about me?"

"Well, I wouldn't say that, but I wouldn't really want you to die, or anything."

"So, you _do_ care about me?"

"What is this, Twenty Questions?"

"No, this is one question."

"Jesus. Okay, fine. I care about you. Only a little bit, but I care."

Tori smiled to herself, and the weight of narrative expectancy hung heavy in the air.

"You could say you care about me," Jade said, a touch impatiently.

"I do care about you."

Tori said it so easily, so honestly, that Jade was derailed for a moment. "I.. Oh. Good." They looked at each other for a moment, and then carried on eating in silence.

"… A little bit."

Jade looked up to see a sly smile on Tori's face, and raised her eyebrows. "A little bit?" she echoed. "That's all I get? I bring you all the way out here to the swankiest place in town, and all I get is 'a little bit'?"

"Hey, that's all you gave me. Anyway, we're not even paying."

" _I'm_ not paying, you mean. I could always tell good old Uncle Eddie that my 'little friend' wants to pick up her own tab."

"You wouldn't!"

"Try me."

"Then I'll tell him you abducted me and brought me here by force."

"Yeah. Because that happens a lot in fancy restaurants."

Tori pouted.

"Okay," Jade said, "I'm willing to revise my offer to... 'somewhat'."

"'Somewhat'?"

"Yeah. As in, more than 'a little bit'."

"Pffft. No one says 'somewhat'," Tori said. "And anyway, I'm not even sure that _is_ more than 'a little bit'. I think it sounds the same."

"No it doesn't."

"Does to me."

"How about, 'moderately'?"

"No."

"'To a certain extent'?"

"Too wordy. And it still just sounds like 'a little bit'."

"Okay, fine." Jade sighed. "So what's your counter-offer?"

Tori thought. "'A lot'."

"No chance. That's way too much."

"No it isn't."

"What about 'quite a lot'?"

Tori considered. "It depends how you say it," she said. "If you mean it in kind of an ironic, understatement sort of way, I guess-"

"Jeez," Jade said. "That's it. You're making this way too complicated."

"Me?"

"How about, 'I care about you', period. That's it. No qualifier."

Tori considered this. "No qualifier?"

"No."

"No ifs and buts? No conditions?"

"None. Just the facts, ma'am."

Tori paused. "Okay," she said, and smiled. "I guess I can live with that."

"Great."

"So say it."

"No."

"Go on."

Jade sighed. "All right. I care about you."

"I care about you, too."

"Okay. Good. Now, can we just get on with our food before it goes cold. Or hot. Or whatever it is that's supposed to happen with it. This stuff should really come with an instruction manual."

.

.

.

They pulled up outside Tori's house, and Jade, without really meaning to, found herself getting out and opening the car door for Tori, who accepted the favor with a smile.

They stood outside the front door. "Thanks," Tori said. "I had a great time."

Jade shrugged. "No problem."

"No, I mean it," Tori said. "That was probably the nicest place I've ever been." She frowned. "Probably the nicest place I'll _ever_ go," she said, ruefully. "The rest of my dating life is going to be kind of a let-down from now on."

"Yeah, let's not get carried away," Jade said, quick to close down any discussion of Tori's romantic future. "It was only a restaurant."

"I know but... it wasn't just the place. It was you."

"Me?"

"Yeah. It was kind of fun that it was just you and me, like it was our little secret."

Jade raised an eyebrow. "You don't think we have enough 'little secrets' right now?"

"You know what I mean. And I really appreciate that you chose me to share it with. At least I was the first, even if I won't be the last."

There was something about the sad little sigh that accompanied this that tugged at Jade's conscience.

"Okay."

"What?"

"It makes you feel any better, I won't take anyone else."

Tori blinked in surprise.

"I mean, it's not as if I've got much choice, anyway," Jade went on, quickly. "I split up with Beck, it would be weird if I asked Andre, and I couldn't stand listening to Cat jabber on for a couple of hours, plus her table manners are kind of disgusting, so who the heck else am I going to take? If I've got to go, it might as well be with you. At least you eat with your mouth shut."

"But-"

"So if that's what you want, if that makes you happy, it can be just us. You and me, once in a while. It can be our..." She pulled a face. "…thing."

"I don't know what to say."

"You could say, _'Why, thank you, Sugarpop, you're just the bestest friend a girl could ever have. I'm not worthy to have such an amazing friend, please allow me to do your science homework from now until we graduate'._ Something like that."

"Well I could, but one, I don't talk like that, and two, I'm not sure I should be helping you with your science, considering you're only going to use it to turn me into a zombie and then murder me again."

"Spoilsport."

"But thank you," Tori said, with a genuine smile. She reached out and took Jade's hands. "You _are_ an amazing friend."

There was some shuffling of feet, and an awkward silence. Had it been a real date, this would have been the cue for one of them to edge closer, to lean in a little further, to invite the possibility of a kiss, but that, of course was unthinkable. Out of the question.

So out of the question and unthinkable was it, that Jade found herself completely blindsided when Tori flung her arms around her and pressed her lips to her cheek. "Thanks," she said again, with a coy bite of the lip. "See you tomorrow." And with that she disappeared through the door, leaving Jade to stand alone in the darkness, one hand pressed to her face, staring after her. She turned, as though in a trance, and made her way back to the car.

She sat there for a while.

.

.

.

 _A month,_ she decided. They'd give it a month.

.

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.

.

**Okay, are we still liking this? The last chapter didn't get many hits, so if I'm going wrong please let me know.**

**The idea of singing comic songs on a grave is lifted from 'Three Men in a Boat' by J.K. Jerome.**


	6. In Vino Veritas

**Hi. Every time I write an A/N I feel like I have something really important to tell you, but I can never remember what it is. Never mind.**

**Anyway, apologies, as always, for how long this is taking. I appreciate your patience. And** **thanks for your reviews, they mean a lot.**

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Tori had that sly look, a look that a few months ago Jade would have dreaded as presaging some terrible caper that was bound to end in disaster. She watched as Tori glanced around, before sidling across the hallway.

"Do you know what today is?" She nudged Jade. "Hmm? Hmm?"

Jade sighed, and waited.

"Today," Tori went on, "is our-"

"One-Month-A-Versary."

Tori's eyes lit up. "You remembered!"

"No. I was just trying to think of the dumbest thing I'd hear before lunchtime."

"Oh."

"Firstly, there's no such word as ' _One-Month-A-Versary'_ , and secondly, as I seem to have to point out on a daily basis, we are Not. Actually. Dating."

Tori pouted. "Spoilsport."

Jade just snorted. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small package "Here."

"What's this?"

"It's for you."

"You bought me something?" Tori said in surprise. "I thought you didn't-"

"Yeah, well," Jade said, uncomfortably, "I knew you'd make a big deal out of it, so I thought I'd better cover my ass."

Tori opened the small paper bag and pulled out a small bracelet, silver charms on an intricate leather band. She slipped it on. "It's beautiful," she said, turning her arm to admire it. "Thank you."

"Don't hug me."

"You know, I think I could get used to all this fake dating," Tori said. "It's got all the advantages of real dating, like presents, and fancy restaurants, and none of the disadvantages."

"What disadvantages?"

"Well, guys, mainly."

"Whoa."

"Especially when they're trying to stick their tongue down your throat. I mean, why do guys do that? Kiss you like they're trying to scoop out a watermelon."

"I think I just threw up a little in my mouth."

"Sorry. Was that too much information?"

"Any information on your past dating habits is too much information," Jade said. "So, what have you got me?"

"What?"

"For our One-Month-Whatever. I hope you got me something, Tori, or else you're on very shaky ground, morally speaking."

"Oh, right," Tori said. She reached into her bag. "Well, I didn't know what to get you, because you hate everything, so instead I made..." She pulled out a plastic tub with a flourish. "Brownies!"

Jade blinked. "You made brownies?"

"Yes." Tori's face fell. "You don't like them?" she said. "I guess I could always give them to the guys and get you something else."

"What? Nonono," Jade's arm snaked out and snatched the tub, clutching it protectively to her chest. "Brownies is good." She popped the lid and stuffed one in her mouth. And then another.

Tori watched her. "Are they okay?"

"Yeff," Jade mumbled through a spray of crumbs. "Ver' good."

"Oh, well... great," Tori said, picking a small speck of brownie debris out of her hair. She watched for a minute as Jade demolished another two. "I mean, you don't have to share them with me, obviously..."

"Forry." Jade reluctantly offered the half-empty tub to Tori.

"Thanks." She took one. "Look, I've been thinking. Does it have to be today?"

"What?"

"I mean, I know we said we'd give it a month, and everything..."

Jade had entirely forgotten. "Er... no, it doesn't have to be today."

"It just seems kind of stupid now we've given each other something."

"Well I've still got the receipt for the bracelet, but I can't give you the brownies back." She patted her stomach. "Well I could, but you'd have to wait a while."

"Eurgh."

"So, you want to do something tonight?"

"To celebrate?"

"No, to alleviate the crushing boredom of our shallow and pointless lives."

"My life's not shallow and pointless."

"Really? Must be just me, then."

"And yours isn't either."

"Isn't it?"

"Of course it isn't. Think of all the things you've got going on."

"Like what?"

"Well, you've got me, for a start."

"Truly, I am the luckiest girl in the world."

"You know, that sounded a little sarcastic."

"Did it? I can't imagine why. So, tonight - yes or no?"

"Where are you taking me?"

"I'm not taking you anywhere. It's your turn."

"My turn?"

"To take me on a... to take me somewhere."

"Oh, right."

"So you'd better come up with something good."

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"Movie night!" Tori announced as they headed out of their last class for the day.

"Movie night?"

"Yeah. We stay in and watch movies. Oh, come on," she said, when Jade looked unconvinced. "'Movie night' is a totally respectable, legitimate kind of date."

"Yeah, if you're a cheapskate."

"I am not a cheapskate!"

"So you're paying for some movies?"

"Well… I thought maybe we'd just see what was on, first."

"I thought so."

"There's no point in paying for a movie if there's something good on for free."

"Right. And maybe we can find some leftover pizza in a dumpster somewhere if we get hungry later."

"That's not fair. It's all right for you, you got to go to the restaurant for free."

"I had to pay for gas."

"I don't have a _car_ ," Tori said. "If I had a car, and a fancy free restaurant, I'd put you in one and drive you to the other. But I don't, so I can't, so it's movie night. Take it or leave it."

Jade sighed. "Okay. What time?"

"Eight?"

"Fine."

"Great."

Pause.

"So, do you want me to check out the dumpsters on the way over, or...?"

"There. Will. Be. Snacks."

"There'd better be."

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Jade rolled up at half past seven. Despite the fact that 'movie night' promised to be indistinguishable from every other night she'd spent sitting around at Tori's house watching TV, she felt slightly nervous. Habit, she decided. Or maybe just the knowledge that 'movie night' was practically date-speak for _'let's get it on while my parents are out'._

Tori opened the door. "Hey!"

"Hey."

Jade looked at her for a moment, and then shook her head, sadly. "Oh, Tori," she said. "Really? Has it come to this?"

"What?"

"It seems like only yesterday that you couldn't wait to see me, that your heart fluttered at my approach, that you'd greet me at the door looking like a million dollars. And now look at you."

"What do you mean?"

"Slippers and an apron, Tori. Where did the magic go?" She peered closer, and frowned. "Also, you look like you've been snorting coke, which is not a good look on you."

Tori blinked, and then rubbed at her nose and sneezed. "It's flour," she explained. "I've been making stuff."

"No need to explain, your secret's safe with me."

"Anyway, you're early. I _was_ going to get changed."

"Don't worry about it. Some people find the 'drug-addled housewife' look quite hot."

"Do they?"

"Probably. Takes all kinds. Are your folks home?"

"No, everyone's out for the night."

"Good. Here." She shoved a bag into Tori's hand.

"What's this?" She held up a bottle. "Is this wine?"

"No, it's the tears of a thousand angels, wept for the death of innocence. Of course it's wine. I've got another two in the trunk, but I didn't want to look like a lush."

"Oh, right. Thanks." Tori looked from Jade to the car parked outside. "Are you really sure you ought to be drinking?" she said, doubtfully.

"Well, I thought..." Jade shrugged, uncomfortably. "I thought maybe I might stay over."

"Oh."

"If that's okay, that is, I mean I wouldn't want to-"

"No, no, that's fine," Tori said quickly. "That would be great."

"Well okay," Jade said, a little relieved. "I'll get my bag." She retreated to the car, rummaged around in the trunk, and returned with a backpack. She followed Tori into the house and dumped it on the floor with a clank.

"Okay," Tori said, pulling something out from her apron pocket and wiggling a pen between her fingers. "Here's the plan. I've been looking at the guide, and this is what we've got." Jade looked over her shoulder to find a crude timetable sketched on a piece of paper.

"At eight o'clock we've got this…" she pointed to the first movie on the list. "Then when that finishes we've got time for a bathroom break before this starts." The pen moved again. "Then we've got a gap of fifteen minutes before we switch over to this one. Alternatively…"

She flipped over the paper. "We could go with this, followed by that, and then a choice between these two."

Jade looked to where she was pointing. "'Sharknadov'?" she said. "Is that some kind of Russian thing?"

"Hmm?" Tori squinted. "Oh. No, that should be 'Sharknado five'. I used a little 'v' sign, you see to-"

"I get it. Looks like a blast. What are these little red areas?"

"Snack breaks. That one's pizza, that one's popcorn."

"What's this one?"

"Miscellaneous."

"'Miscellaneous'?"

"You get a choice."

"Of what?"

"Follow me." Tori led her over to the kitchen. "Ta-da!"

Jade surveyed the table. "Wow."

"Impressed?"

Jade was. She'd assumed that Tori's cooking would be much like her science projects, well-meaning but ultimately hopeless. But then her brownies had been on point, and this lot looked delicious, so maybe she was doing her a disservice. "Are we expecting someone else?"

"No, why?"

"There's quite a lot of food here."

"That's because all the recipes said 'serves four'."

"Why didn't you just use half the ingredients?"

"Because, Miss Smarty-pants, it's pretty difficult to add 'half an egg'."

"Well you could-"

"They just go splat when you try to cut them. The shell just cracks."

Jade stared at her. "Anyway," Tori went on, "it doesn't matter, I'll just box the leftovers up and take them to school."

Jade shrugged. "Okay," she said. She reached out for a small cupcake, only to find her hand slapped.

"Not yet," Tori said. "We're not due for cupcakes until nine forty-three."

"Oh."

"You can have a breadstick."

"Thanks." Jade took one, and crunched it. "I don't mean to be critical, Tori, but all this timing seems like a lot of effort. Couldn't we just pick something on Netflix, or something?"

"I thought it'd be more fun this way."

"Why?"

"Because it's more like going to the movies."

"Why, are you going to sit right in front of me in a big hat and talk all the way though it? 'Cos that's what usually happens to me at the movies."

"No, I mean, half the fun of going to the movies is in the buildup, sitting there in the dark, with your popcorn, and your soda, waiting for the movie to start," Tori said. "It's all in the anticipation. If you can just watch it whenever you want it's not the same."

"So if you want it to be more like the movies, why the heck didn't we just go to the movies?"

"Because I'm broke, okay?" Tori said, exasperated. "You know, you could have just come over, or we could have hung out with the guys," she said, sulkily. "But you wanted this to be a date, so this is what it is, this is the best I could do."

Jade felt guilty. "I'm sorry." Tori just sniffed, and looked away. "I really am," Jade persisted. "I know you've gone to a lot of trouble, and I'm being a gank about it. It's just… I don't know. I'm too used to it. You bring out the worst in me."

Tori snorted. "Thanks," she said. "That's nice to know."

"But also the best," Jade said. "I mean, me and Beck, we used to argue all the time. Major blow-ups, once, twice a week. What you saw at school was just the minor stuff. But with you, we've haven't argued at all." She paused. "Well, hardly at all."

"Yes, but that's different. We're not actually dating, are we?"

"But we're spending a lot of time together," Jade insisted. "And not only that, I haven't hurt anyone else, either. I've been nice to Cat, I've helped Robbie with his homework, I even lent Sinjin a pencil the other day. Gave it right to him, just like that. In his hand, too, not up his nose or anything."

"Hmmm."

"In fact, I'm pretty much a saint, these days, Tori," Jade said, radiating sincerity, "and it's all down to you. You make me," she said, resting her hands solemnly on Tori's shoulders, "a better person."

There was a long pause, and Tori finally relented.

"Okay, I forgive you," she said. "But only because we're going to miss the movie if I don't." She looked around. "What time is it?"

"It's almost," Jade said, reaching into her bag and pulling out the bottle with a grin, "wine o'clock."

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And so movies were watched, and wine was drunk, and the evening settled down into a snug familiarity, as they sat, side by side, upright at first but slowly sliding down into a comfortable sprawl, feet up on the small table, shoulders touching, eating, watching, laughing, talking. At one point, Tori accidentally nudged Jade's feet off the table, Jade retaliated by kicking Tori's off, and so it went on until Tori solved the problem by simple putting her legs on top of Jade's, which strangely, Jade didn't object to. Halfway through the last movie on Tori's itinerary, a romance so bland and generic that Jade could practically fell herself forgetting it even as she watched, Tori nudged her. "See?" she said, tipsily. "It's not such a bad date, is it?"

Jade smiled to herself. "No, Tori," she said. "It's not bad at all." And she felt Tori's head tilt until it was resting on her shoulder, hear the tiny sigh of satisfaction.

A few minutes passed as she basked in the warmth of the contact and she decided now was as good a time as any to say something.

"Can I tell you something, Tori?" she said. "This is going to sound kind of weird, and if you tell anyone, I'll... well, I won't actually kill you, 'cos I wasn't kidding before, you do kind of make me a better person, but I'll definitely do something gross. But the thing is... you and me, we're pretty good together, you know? We have a lot of fun. I'm having a better time not-dating you than I ever had real-dating Beck, apart from the sex, and even that was nothing special. In fact, if I had to choose between dating you with no sex, and dating him with it, I'd probably go for you." She hiccupped, gently. "Yeah, you heard me. I'd give it up, just for you. Because the thing is, I quite like you, Vega. We get along. I know I give you a hard time about a lot of stuff, but that's just because you're all perky and optimistic, and that annoys me 'cos I'm pretty cranky deep down…" She giggled to herself, as she imagined the look on Tori's face. "Yeah, I know, you'd never guess. But sometimes I think you're the only one that understands, the only one that really... fits me. Maybe that's it, we just fit together, like two halves of a puzzle, lock and key, yin and yang, all that crap. It just works. I guess that's why all this fake dating seems so easy. We just work."

She paused, and frowned. "Maybe we should just stick with it, what do you think?" she said. "Give up guys, and sex, and all that relationship stuff, and just fake date our way through school. Then after college, we could fake staying together, invite everyone to a big fake wedding, and people would buy us all kinds of cool stuff. And then we could just fake settle down, you and me, and live out the rest of our lives in peace. Maybe get a couple of fake grandkids from somewhere when we retire.

"Would that be worth it, Tori? Would it be worth a life of subterfuge just to know you were going to spend it with someone you trust, someone you care about? 'Cos I'd do that. I'd do that like a shot. I was terrified of spending my life with Beck, always worrying that he was going to cheat on me, or find someone better, or hurt me, but you'd never do that, would you, Tori? You'd never let me down. I trust you. You know why?"

Judging by her silence, it seemed Tori didn't. "Well I'll tell you," Jade said, waggling her glass for emphasis, spilling half of it. "Because at the end of the day - and it pains me to say this, and I don't want you to get all bouncy and huggy about it – I think you're my best friend."

She laughed. "What do you think about that, Vega?" she said. "You're my best buddy. My BFF. Who'd have thought it? Not that I really have any other friends as such, but… Tori? Hey, Tori. Tori?"

She twisted her head to look down at the other girl, and was rewarded with a long and sonorous snore, which suggested that Tori hadn't heard any of this. Jade sighed. _Probably for the best_. She slipped out from under Tori's weight and laid her gently on the sofa while she went to rinse out the glasses and stashed the wine bottles back in her bag away from prying eyes. Then she returned to the sofa to tackle the thorny problem of getting Tori to bed.

In the movies, it was easy, you just scooped them up in your arms, and carried them away, usually in slow motion while cars exploded in the background. But in reality, it wasn't quite so simple. Tori didn't weigh much, but then neither did Jade. She slipped one hand underneath the sleeping girl's shoulders, one under her knees, and lifted, but Tori just slid through the middle, like spaghetti between two forks. She persevered, and finally managed to get upright using one knee to support Tori's butt, but this made moving impossible. She was just about to give up and throw a blanket over her when Tori stirred, not waking but conscious enough to instinctively put her arms around Jade's neck for support, her head nestling into the curve of Jade's neck. And so, with this slight co-operation, she managed to maneuver her charge to the foot of the stairs, and ascend, one step at a time, until finally she kicked open the bedroom door, dumped Tori into bed, and crawled in gratefully beside her.

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**And so it's goodnight. For them, at least. Jade is probably the only person in school that's ever had to address the question of 'how to get Tori into bed' as a purely practical problem.**

**I promise there'll only be another couple of chapters of this and then I'll leave you in peace. Although there may be a chapter or two of 'Green Eyes' to endure as well.**


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